Squirm by Matt Potter

“We should start a virgins’ support group,” said Cindi one autumn afternoon. We were sitting in the bay window of the Campus Coffee Cavern, musing on ways to further international relations.

I was lukewarm about her idea.

But I was also new in Zwingle, Iowa – a political science exchange student from Australia – and first impressions are important.

“What would the criteria be for joining?” I asked. “Would there be a test?”

“You’d have to be a virgin,” said Cindi, eyes cloudy with thought. “But I can always tell, anyway.”

We sipped our steaming double super-skinny latté moccachinoes through heat-resistant plastic straws.

“I knew you were a virgin when I first met you yesterday,” she said, humming into her drink. “You have that … glow.”

I licked my straw, up and down the shaft.

“But could you still become a member if you lost it … in a riding accident?” I asked.

Cindi’s straw slipped back into her froth.

“Then there was the time I sat on a pencil,” I sighed, my head shaking.

Cindi reached across the table and placed her hand on mine. It was cold, odd considering the warmth of our double super-skinny latté moccachinoes.

She looked deep into me. “The important thing is keep trying, Bronny. If you fall off the virginity wagon, the Lord wants you to get back on straight away.”

We smiled, sipping our drinks again.

Cindi hunched over her froth, her seat squirming. “Gee, I bet that pencil felt amazing.”

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Filed under Matt Potter

6 responses to “Squirm by Matt Potter

  1. Matt Potter

    Thanks – I loved writing it, to finally write my ‘virgin support group’ story was exciting and another idea / topic to tick off

  2. Snort.

    Out loud. Loved the licking the straw’s shaft. Love how your stuff always circles around sex. Peace…

    • Matt Potter

      I know, it’s terrible! I was going over in my head how many of these flash pieces (and those to come, I have been working ahead of time, having lots of time on my hands recently) and realised more than half were about sex! Hmmm … will have to bump up the love quotient! The straw … I wrote that without even realising that was about sex too, so what does that tell you?! Thank you for your snort!

  3. Oh. Wow.

    Amazing isn’t the word that comes to mind. :)

    LOL Hilarious.

    • Matt Potter

      Danke … I think if I had eavesdropped on this conversation – on a bus, in a café – I would have collapsed with laughter and perhaps even snorted my drink across the table! I actually read about it in a non-fiction book, the support group was a real and serious idea. Thanks for reading again – I always appreciate it, and the time you take to comment.

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