Unseen by Beate Sigriddaughter


What will you do, Lord, when I die?

– Rainer Maria Rilke

Halfway up the mountain a grown man sits, solemn, in a patch of daisies. A moment later a preoccupied black bear lumbers in the distance, first toward a clutch of trees, then out of sight. At the top I can see Mt. Baker to the east and twelve ships out in English Bay to the west. And far beyond.

On the way down, the sunset pierces me exactly where my longing lives. I ache for Venezuela waterfalls that I will likely never see, for a polished amage in Buenos Aires, for this year’s crop of yellow-centered forget-me-nots in the Sangre de Cristo mountains, for this year’s horned lizards zipping through the Gila Wilderness.

I am ashamed of days when sunsets came and went and I stood stapling minutes into board meeting packets till dark. And I am not ashamed, too. It was expected and I had agreed to it. Now my job is to see what I can do to help out God whom I have sometimes blamed for being blind.

In my dreams, my mother sings to me: “Das gibts nur einmal…” I shall wear red to honor the unseen.

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4 Comments

Filed under Beate Sigriddaughter

4 responses to “Unseen by Beate Sigriddaughter

  1. “Das gibts nur einmal…” – there is so much Deutsch on this site! I like it, and loved the South American references too. And I liked the way you expressed the wish for something different – “I am ashamed of days when sunsets came and went and I stood stapling minutes into board meeting packets till dark. And I am not ashamed, too.” – yet knowing exactly why it was not and could not be.

  2. I’ve read this beautiful story three times now. I’m still not sure how it makes me feel. I’ll read it again tonight when all is calm and the world is quiet, Thank You.

  3. Simple and yet so complex, just as is the nature of man and his understanding of his world at different stages of his life. Beautifully written, Beate.

  4. Pingback: Week #21 – Unseen « 52|250 A Year of Flash

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