quelle horror! quelle dommage! by Quenby Larsen

He would surely be fired, observed Chef, of Errand Guy #24, George, whose name Mme Stache pronounced in the French way. “Jacques” whose actual name was Jimmy and “Andre,” aka “Andy” had gone out in much the same way. Having failed to realize the way in which the woman anthropomorphized her dog according to its haircut, they did not do the one thing that would satisfy her: To make Fifi look like a happy, innocent young pooch.

If the dog’s hair became dirty and matted, she looked like a grimacing old man or a crook. If Errand Guy, who was in charge of taking the dog to the groomer, did not convey the message that Fifi was to have “Teddy Bear Eyes,” Mme became distraught when Fifi inevitably came back with a low shelf of hair over her eyes. The cut made Fifi look angry, said Mme, like “an angry little bitch.” As the hair softened and dirtied, the little dog looked friendlier again but she also looked like little waif, like a little trampy thief.

Chef felt respect for George when he realized he was torturing Mme Stache on purpose. Soon George and Chef became lovers. Soon they went away. Chef left his ladle in a pot on a cold burner on the stove, along with his apron and hat. George left a tape with the message: “My name is George. That’s G-E-O-R-G-E.” He pronounced the letters in the American way.


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6 responses to “quelle horror! quelle dommage! by Quenby Larsen

  1. I love stories that poke fun at people, at ourselves really. You’ve found one of our vulnerabilities and sang about it.

    • Quenby Larsen

      I’m glad you saw it as my poking fun at ourselves. How much like Mme Stache am I! That doggie cut is ever important in our day to day relationship with my wee one. Frivolous and silly, for sure. Thanks Susan. — Q

  2. The ending — priceless. I won’t shake that ladle in the pot any time soon. Peace…

  3. Pingback: Week #26 – bad haircut « 52|250 A Year of Flash

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