I Wear my Square Sunglasses by Walter Bjorkman

Eddie, standing on the outskirts of SLC, thumb out, getting hot, thirsty, tired and pissed off.

“If I see one more damn pair of horn-rimmed glasses go by me with a mannequin-wife in the seat next to him, trying not to look at me . . .” he raised his fist to the one cloud in the sky that danced around the sun but never passed in front. Sure, why does he deserve any shade.

“Damn glasses are square glasses, for squares wear them, so their square mannequin-wives don’t have to look in their eyes, lest they see lust, which they won’t anyway. And they are solid black square eyeglasses which is a relief to their square mannequin-wives who can’t look in their eyes. And their two tiny square-clones in the square backseat in the boxy square-car, that can’t look in their square-father’s eyes either, and won’t look at me neither, wearing the same square black glasses at the age of three squared, nine. And, you, cloud, I swear you are changing your shape to be square as you not block the sun – if I could look directly at the sun, I’d probably see that it’s square right here in gaddamm Utah, a square state in shape, even the cutout in the northeast where Wyoming juts in is square!”

“Whew, glad I got that off my chest, I feel better now.” Eddie apologized to the sky, which wasn’t square, then immediately burst into square flames.

.

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10 Comments

Filed under Walter Bjorkman

10 responses to “I Wear my Square Sunglasses by Walter Bjorkman

  1. Len

    this was a lot of fun. i had a clear image in my head the whole read. nice job, walter.

  2. John Riley

    I love the square state. Good one.

  3. Great buildup of anger, the release, the finale.

  4. Hehe… I kept picturing Hunter S. Thompson for this one…

  5. Kim Hutchinson

    Love that he burst into square flames…

  6. Catherine Davis

    Wonderful. I see only now I didn’t comment when I read it the first time. Fine! because I like it even more the second time. So love an image carried (so deftly) to the extreme. A cloud that refuses to block the sun, square mannequin-wives, no shade, not-looking, three squared nine… contrariness, negatives, juxtapositions, opposites… rant to the sky = packed, delicious, archetypal.

  7. Walter

    Thank you – I do have to say that Eddie later apologizes to the good people of Utah. After all, many were conscientious objectors. There was that time when he innocently got caught up in a protest over Catch-22 playing in town, as he was one of only three patrons though. His arse still hurts when he thinks about it. Let us say now he is reassessing that apology . . .

  8. This has a wonderful cantering feel, the image of square smooshed and spread and rolled over in a wonderful cacophony of words. You have such an amazingly unique way of writing. Peace…

  9. Pingback: Week #33 – Spontaneous combustion | 52|250 A Year of Flash

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