She sat in ant.icipation, watched a fire.fly. It was her first night vigil. By daylight, she had laughed the task away. I’m no cow.ard, she had stated. She swallow.ed. Fact was, the night had a fourth, fur.ious dimension, there, next to the r.eal river. And just like her, the forest, so calm at noon, now was dealing with its own moving bear.ings. |
. |
H.owl by Dorothee Lang
Filed under Dorothee Lang
– with thanks to Daniela Elza, who sparked the idea of including the words that can be found inside words in a story. (here’s one of her stories: “The Math Ex.am” – http://www.blueprintreview.de/24math.htm )
fabulous phrasing and really like the …s
I love this, great idea too. Adds a fourth dimension to the story.
What a clever idea. I want to try this. Aside from the words within words, I’m impressed that you can create such a strong a mood in so few words. I also liked “the forest was dealing with its own bearings.” Doris
So clever; an enjoyable read. Thanks!
Love the abstraction in the writing, if feels like an art installation, lovely
this was fantastic. it was like reading sculpture or a painting. brilliant for being so clever, but also the writing was deft and so sure.
Reading this with the periods was like opening a box of crackerjacks for the secret prize inside. Delightful.
what a great ride, loved it. the technique is marvelous and you do it so well. a bit like a multidimensional story in 2d.
Great idea. I love “eal river.” Thanks for introducing me to the method.
great use of technique playful intriguing sharply felt impressions
thanks for all your feedback. glad you enjoy the story and wordplay. i had really fun writing this. after i came across ant.icipation, my mind went on a word hunt. i also found mon.key & don.key, but they didn’t quite fit in. if anyone wants to pick them up, feel free to do so :)
Pingback: Strange Places » fractured words
Love the story, Dorothee.
This technique is quite appropriate and fun for such short pieces. Should give it a name.”Breathing inside words,” perhaps?
Thanks for the nod.
Like a poem, story, and crossword puzzle all wrapped in one. Lovely tone. Peace…
Pingback: Week #26 – Animal behavior | 52|250 A Year of Flash