Olympus to Earth by Catherine Russell

The dark-haired beauty examined the painting of a young woman embraced by a swan; amusement and repugnance battling across her face. The museum curator noticed her interest and approached.

“Wonderful; isn’t it?” he said.

“Leda and Zeus; right?”

“Yes, the god loved her in the form of a swan,” answered the curator. “A lovely myth.”

The woman arched an eyebrow. “Seriously?”

“Of course,” said the curator. ‘A beautiful white bird seduced the Queen of Sparta.”

“But… she thought that was sexy?”

“Well, Hera, the wife of-”

“Oh, figures. Cheating bastard shapeshifts so he can bonk another woman.”

“But that union created legends! Helen of Troy, Clytemnestra, their twin brothers -”

“Yeah, but the method! ‘Hey baby, wanna lay my eggs?’ – Worst pickup line EVER.”

“Good point, but-”

“How could a bird force Leda to do anything? He must have offered her one hell of a bribe.”

“Yeats wrote that-”

“Though I suppose Zeus was out of touch with mortals already. Olympus is a long way from Sparta – by altitude anyway.”

Hera left the curator red-faced and spluttering. The goddess of marriage looked forward to watching Zeus squirm when she mentioned her trip to the art gallery, though his infidelity was so ridiculous she could barely keep a straight face. Turning into a swan? As if her husband wasn’t already a bird brain.

.

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14 Comments

Filed under Catherine Russell

14 responses to “Olympus to Earth by Catherine Russell

  1. Leda and the Swan is one of my favorite legends. You brought it to contemporary life here! Well done!

  2. randalhoule

    Well done, Catherine. I am laughing pretty hard right now. Enjoyed.

  3. Clearly somebody needs to get swanned.

  4. What a witty exploration, such fun to be inside Hera’s head and her POV of Zeus! I was chuckling at your seamless dialogue and the premise is really fantastic.

  5. Awesome take on the theme; my wife thinks I’m a bird-brain too. Thanks for sharing.

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  7. guy

    Ha. I know a guy named Zeus. If i showed you a picture and said thare’s a guy named Zeus here, which one is it? you’d pick the right guy every time. As far as i know he has had no swan incidents. Naturally i insert him into this little tale.

  8. (snort)
    Very clever and funny, a great take-down of the immortals. Peace…

  9. Tom O'Connell

    a museum curator is no match for a goddess.
    a great, fun read.

  10. Al McDermid

    I love this, bringing the ancient gods into our world, but I really like Hera gossiping about Zeus. I’m still smiling.

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  12. What fun! A classic argument well done.

  13. i always wondered about that shape shifting thing. in a jealous kind of way. not anymore though, of course, your story changed all that ;-) more “myths, revisited”, please!

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