by | April 23, 2011 · 3:10 pm
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Matron by Robert Vaughan

Mrs. Harry Lynde Bradley says, “Call me Peg.”

Has a lifetime supply of Aqua Net.
Swims naked in her sixty square foot fishtank.
Dances the lindy, sits under picnic tables.
Whistles a multitude of birdcalls.
Is batshit about Badger games.

“She was a bitch,” her maid, Opal recalls.

Daphne says, “A gem, a true-blue friend.”

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14 Comments

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14 responses to “Matron by Robert Vaughan”

  1. susan
    April 29, 2011 at 2:38 pm

    I like this, I like the instant assessment of her, the things we have learned about her to decide.

    Reply
  2. ganymeder
    April 29, 2011 at 4:08 pm

    The switched past and present tenses threw me a little, but I loved the compact summation of her character.

    Reply
  3. guy
    April 30, 2011 at 11:34 am

    I like the contrapuntal “She was a bitch” from the maid. I don’t think this would work without it.

    Reply
    • Robert Vaughan
      May 2, 2011 at 9:07 am

      I agree, Guy. I originally write this without, and was going to continue that way, and it started to sound too much reportage in style. So I added the maids line at the end originally. Then at the Tuesday roundtable, I got the generous suggestion to insert it before Daphne’s last line. Voila! Thanks for commenting.

      Reply
  4. Michael Parker
    May 1, 2011 at 5:41 pm

    Robert, I like the staccato poetics of this piece and the small revelations of the person, Peg. I also like how the color blue comes through in the words “Aqua”, “true blue friend,” and the visual of Peg swimming in a fishtank. It’s like a cohesive element of this and I find it clever. I also agree with “Guy’s” comment. Great write.

    Reply
    • Robert Vaughan
      May 2, 2011 at 9:09 am

      Thanks Michael, love “staccato poetics,” just a wonderful comment! And I also had not noticed the bluish coloration, so your insights made me wonder if it was intentional or from some other place, that uninformed part of writing. Great pondering.

      Reply
  5. Theo
    May 2, 2011 at 4:35 am

    Great piece the way you have structured it. Love the Opal comment.

    Reply

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  7. susan tepper
    May 4, 2011 at 9:28 am

    Peg was the name of my first mother-in-law! Did you meet her somewhere? Jesus! You nailed her! So funny and perfect in such a short span.

    Reply
    • Robert Vaughan
      May 5, 2011 at 11:34 am

      I wrote this on a day I spent at the local art museum. Peg devoted money for an entire wing and yet there was this annoying loop tape with audio that played constantly and thus the piece came from that. I swear I never met your Peg!

      Reply

  8. Pingback: Week #50 – Home sweet home | 52|250 A Year of Flash

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