Paulin turned his field jacket collar up. “Jeez, the desert gets cold at Sergeant Snyder squirmed over on his side to ease a lower leg muscle cramp. Lonely stars glanced at each other in the dark sky. Occasional flashes to the “Do you suppose they know we’re over here, Sarge?” “Now what the hell do you think?” “I was just asking. This is your third hitch and I’ve been here three days.” “Paulin, they damn well know we’re here — feel better?” “I’d kind of like to see who’s trying to kill me tonight.” “If you don’t wanna die, stop joinin’ the fuggin’ army.” The sergeant inched his way up the knoll with his elbows, keeping his weapon out Snyder turned his head. ”Keep that goddamn muzzle outta the dirt — squeeze off The breeze stopped and silence took over. “Paulin — hear that? “Hear what?” Snyder propped himself on an elbow and looked back. “I heard a rustlin’ sound “Sarge, if you’re tryin’ to scare the crap out of a new man, yer doing a good “Is that what I smel–” Shots knifed through the dawn. |
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THE SANDY KNOLL by Ramon Collins
Filed under Ramon Collins
And it ends with a final and complete silence. Well done.
Great interplay of the characters and buildup of conflict and tension. Nicely done, Ramon.
The last sound heard is the shots. Great ending.
Great details for setting, and the dialogue moves the story along so effectively. And that multi-faceted ending, well done against the backdrop of this week’s theme.
Thanks, Ray. I’m so glad to have found you here, today!
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